June 26, 2009

stronger

girls: don't let a silly little boy run your life. seriously?
have some more self respect..know that your stronger than that & your deserve way better than what you were prolly given.
its hard not to believe everything he said to you isnt true anymore..i know; but it happened & thats all that counts.
don't look back on what you had and cry because its gone, but smile at all the good times you did have & keep loving & living your life the way you deserve to.
if you want to call your ex 20 times a day when he clearly wants nothing to do with you, then thats how you know you need help.
you most likely won't listen to your friends..your gonna do what you wanna do. but just know your way better than that. to let him constantly be in your mind when the relationship is over. to let him not allow you to just be happy..
its not fair. to you, or even to him. he may have hurt you but you need to forgive him because once you do that, he no longer has control over you or your life. thats really the first step to moving on. & it just gets better from there.
its gonna be hard..like really hard. but its possible. you don't wannna be in this..rut for your whole life, do you?
everyone deserves to be happy :)

yeah, uhm i was on a roll, i guess ^^^^^^
hahah :P

i'm chillin' with my dad at his work..so blogg some more later!
<3

June 25, 2009

fact.

why do girls always read into things? do we feel that we might find some sign of good new or possibley bad new. the lyrics of songs on their profile or they favorite playlists cannot mean anything..right?
see, there i go reading into things. its just not..fair. to just walk in & out of my life so many times. your out now, & i think its for sure, but who knows..maybe you'll change your mind again.! but who's hoping for that!? :|
not me *sarcastic voice*

i could totally live without this, because i sure as heck deserve to but i don't want to let go yet. i keep thinking, there's still a chance..which in reality there might not be. what are you afraid of, if you are afriad of anything that is?
"maturity" isnt the problem..your afraid. of what? i have no clue..maybe its to fall harder..or to not fall at all then just walk away from it; again.
this may be old news but there are little things that you do to make me have faith or hope agian. i dunoo i'm done haha..
just needed to get that out !

adios; :)

June 24, 2009

guilt.

what is it exactly? your conscience telling you that you've done something wrong..& to admit it? although it may not nessecarily be wrong, just the fact that you lied about doing what ever it is you did to your mom, your aunt, your bestfriend.

i don't regret it. i mean i would've gone through with it eventually, i just wish i gone about it more wisely!
i guess i'm just afraid of getting caught by my mother. i mean she trusts me so much.
this will definetly dissapoint her:/ i'll tell her..eventually. & yes i'm still a virgin!
but for now i'm living. & i'm not looking back. i did it& i'm proud of myself.
because, me! doing..that? yeah thats not hypocritical or odd *in sacastic voice*
but over the course of two weeks, i've learned alot about myself, & about what God has in store for me. all the struggles he puts me through is for a reason. its to open my eyes & forget about all my material things, & about what people think of me! its about what He thinks of me. what My God thinks of me; because thats all that really matters. i live and have been living my life for Him. yeah i mess up, i make mistakes but i don't consider what i did a mistake..God was guiding me towards that choice to help me realize all the ways i've been neglecting the people that should mean the most to me.
Thank you Father God,<3 & i'm sorry mom.

June 13, 2009

boysboysboys;

whoa, i haven't blogged ina while! sorry about that. here's the updates:
-i finished finasl
-schools out :D
-blank & i are over...i thinkk? *you should know who blank is btw* (well he never told me but i'm pretty sure it is)
well lets talk about boys. *sigh* when will they learn? its not fair to girls that they get to just pull the plug! well we do to, but not in some situations. at least have the balls to TELL us its over! haha don't just WAIT 'till we find out! have some common curtisy! This has yet to affect me because i believe i'm over it already..before it actually happened. like, i've been put in the same situation over and over again that i thinhk i'm just use to it so by the time is does happen (& it WILL happen *obviously*) that i'll be ready for it! ha well yeah. i'm fine, & fit as a fiddle(:
i'll always love him<3 & he's will remain one of my best friends!
OH YEAH; i'm kinda crushing on this one guy who's name i will not reveal..yet.

okk thanks for readin', i'm out<3