Im studying for Psych and for some reason this thought dawned on me: I miss the way things use to be. I know everyone says stuff like that but I was just thinking I'm an adult now. I have to make my own decisions, I study and I'll have focus. My dad and step mom recently divorced and I just thought about that and how I'm not a little kid anymore. I can't go over there every other weekend and bake with Beth or play with Ashley or watch T.V carelessly. Or swim in the pool whenever I wanted. I just realized there is so much I need to start caring about now that I'm older. I truly wish that I could go back to the way my life was before they divorced and before I started college or senior year. It makes me sad to think of these things because I enjoyed my time over there even if Lorena didn't really like going. I did. I liked it there. It felt like home and its something so familiar to me that was taken away by the divorce and by adulthood. It was so simply back then and easy and happy even in the times when I was sad. I had that.
David passed away today. I feel I should recognized this. He was a special man, Im not sure what was wrong with him but he was like a child. So young and naive. (He had a mental condition). He was hit by a car in front of Eduardos and its really upsetting to think about that. His body lying in the road as his family stood on the sidelines unable to speak to their brother and son anymore. I cried a little bit and I know it was hard on my mom because although it would bother her to go out to dinner with him sometimes I know she enjoyed spending time with him. And I know its hurting her too. David was the brother of her best friend so I could imagine how that would hit home. I pray for the Cortez Family. Bring them healing in this moment Lord. I pray that you heal their hearts and remind them that you will take care of them and to rejoice that David is in heaven. I don't want to take my life for granted.